Craigslist apartment search ends in failure (or success???) A tale of a divisive fat chick.

gross

So I've been searching Boston for a new apartment, naturally on Craigslist, and thought I found a good one. This was advertised as 4 or 5 girls, 4:20 friendly, like to hang out, party every now and then, laid back, etc. Best part is, they specifically asked for a guy. I thought I found a pretty sweet place so I decided to email them.

As an aside to this story, I saw this huge, huge, enormous girl lumber out of MassArt around Longwood Medical Area in Boston a few weeks ago. This girl was so epic, I had to turn to the stranger next to me, this old black guy, and make a comment. We proceed to laugh and joke together about what an enormous troll we just saw. I also tweeted the following "Just saw a monster bitch on longwood Ave Boston.Like 6'9" dieseled out ogre.Once in a lifetime monster. She was eating a Billy goat.I swear." 


So back to my apartment shopping story on craigslist. The place sounded real nice. I can't do the ensuing hilarity justice, so I will simply post the email exchange that followed. 


Me: Hey,
Just saw the ad on craigslist and I'm interested. My name is BFM. I'm 24, graduated from Umass, I'm from the X originally and I work at Y doing Z. That being said, I smoke and drink on the weekends. I do like to party on weekends too, but usually I'm out exploring the bar scene. I have a gf and she would swing by on the weekends. I don't smoke in the house, but I'm fine with it if you do. Nowadays I'm quiet during the week, but I'll go out every now and then on a thursday. I like sports, beer, poker, bar trivia, etc. I'd say I'm a pretty social guy.
If you're interested, I'd love to swing by and see the place Saturday. I'm commuting right now and it's brutal. So let me know. Thanks!
BFM

E: hey BFM, 
here are some photos of the apartment. you sound pretty cool and we would love for you to come by and check the place out. what time would you be able to stop by on saturday? if you want to call or text me, my number is XXX XXX XXXX.
E

Less than an hour later, I receive another email from E...

E: BFM,
we googled your name and found your twitter account. "the monster bitch on longwood ave" is our best friend and an amazing woman. so scratch saturday.
 E

Me: E,

Is that so? you know every monster bitch on longwood ave? There's a few. I calls em likes i sees em. Well if you're going to be this judgmental and make snap decisions we'll call it off. Wouldn't want her coming by to weaken the house's foundation anyway.
BFM

Anyway, who's more in the wrong here? Me tweeting when I saw an ogre in Boston, or the 'friend' who reads that tweet and says 'THAT MUST BE INGRID! WHAT A JERK!" I think I'm glad I didn't decide to live here. What if she came by and plowed through everything in the refrigerator? I'd be out the cost of food, and more than likely be living in a sinkhole when the house buckles under the weight of this behemoth.